The stream only gathers a crowd when it falls...
archives: 21 22 23 24 reddit blogger
2025
November
Focus, VR Gallery (ONLINE NOW), Midwest Activity book (hand drawn), 3 Book projects (freelance work) Give this one month and then try to get back into painting. no pressure. Take a break from videos (I’ll try)…
Luxury vs. Quality. Quality can be valuable in practical ways. A shirt that cost $49 but lasts 4x’s longer than a $20 shirt is cheaper. The $49 shirt actually costs $7.75 less over time. My oil change was $109 but now lasts 10,000 miles whereas I was paying $60 every 3,000 to do it myself. Now $90 less. Luxury is unnecessary excess.
17
Still have my Adobe for a month, might as well continue and complete the hand drawn Midwestern activity book. My windows and doors coloring book sold well, this one might too! Going to put some serious effort into this and post updates. With a longer term goal of going back into painting and not freelancing.
16
Going to try to go back to oil painting. Thinking of a series of panels I could sell here or etsy. hold on, brb. (give me like 5 days)
15
Freelancers have it harder than ever. When I started freelancing, there were little to no competitors. Work came to me. The relationship I had with my clients was ideal. Coming to you, means you are serving a need and no cold calling. It is a much different relationship when you are asking for someone to hire you and now its even worse because of global competition and ai.
A past client encouraged me to come back and was worried she would not find another artist that was not a scammer. The cost of doing business as a freelancer is much higher now too, with lower pay. Software, hosting, and now paying just to reply (among many others) to job postings (i.e. upwork ‘credits’) After these two book projects I am winding this all back down. (unless I get enough new work to at least cover its monthly costs.)
AI videos were extremely difficult at first, taking days to complete one video with barely usable .05sec segments. NOW, the ai videos can be rendered PRE EDITED, which is the part that I enjoyed the most. I knew it would happen. I’ll still make them, but with increasingly less input in it’s creation. I do see a time where ANYTHING is possible, that will be a time where it will be like filming with a camera. When it is so perfect that the technology has to add defects to make it seem more realistic. I heard that swiss cheese was loosing its holes until they found a mixture of airborne bacteria that came from barn hay, seems similar to this. Artificial grit.
I also heard the new AI in china can render unlimited, so like a whole movie, podcast etc.. Soon all human/ai work will be purely idea based. I.e. no other labor/skillset.
9
Working on a NEW hand drawn Midwestern activity book. Mostly mazes and some midwestern trivia. *(on hold)
4
3
I noticed a few of my favorite pieces of artwork were missing from the site, let’s look for them in the image archives;
As I go through all the past images that were trimmed for one reason or another I get to thinking. How trimming things for effect or meaning is good, but trimming to please this person and that person really makes the whole thing fall apart and things get lost in the process, valuable things.
Bingo, This is the one I was looking for, going to make a video with it. BRB.
1
October
30
Got some of my paintings out of storage. It’s nice to look at and remember. I think it will motivate me to go back to storage and get the unfinished work out to complete, not yet.
28
My son sent me a code to get into Sora, I used it to create 29 video clips, then with another account and same pass I was able to create 30 more. After that I put two quick videos together from those renders and will try again once 24 hours have passed. (Using two google accounts) SORA INVITE CODE J6R32N
A pivotal moment in my life was a chance encounter with a wise man when I was a cashier at Walgreens. 17 at the time and fixated on writing. He said something in another language and I replied in Japanese (which I was taking in school) He laughed and told me he knew 12 languages fluently. He asked me what I planned to do with my life and I told him I wanted to be a writer. I went on to tell him that I was studying psychology so that I would know how to create characters. He told me to focus on observing as many real people as possible. That while psychological profiles were potentially flawed interpretations, observing real people in real life was never wrong.
27
While going through my divorce, I was devastated. I remember it coming in waves and feeling as though I had dived into a pool but couldn’t find the ladder to get out. It was during this time, alone and hopeless, laying on a blow up mattress. That I reached for my other hand across my chest. I held my hand in the other and the other with the other. I knew then that I would always have my own back. It was comforting, and still is. Every video has 2 likes from me and my alt acct, because I never stop believing in myself.
26
Last month, Google offered a 50% discount for VEO3 ($125 for 30 days) which have just now expired. I had been anxiously waiting to use it and It was amazing! Googles VEO3 seems to operate the same way production does. i.e. works best with two main characters and a quick choreographed scene. I noticed some visual effects repeating, like an 80s retro digital sun and a propensity for ‘tunneling’. Surreal is almost always clocks and fish but it does seem to understand negative terms (finally). I was grateful for the opportunity and loved making them. The result was -12 subs and .03 cents so far. That’s ok, they are archived. They may be more appreciated once the AI hype has subsided a bit (hard to be seen in a crowd, let alone understood.) I think Sora will surpass VEO in ‘realism’ because it seems less framed for production and just filming what you want . If I am ever able to afford and gain access to Sora (or others) I will definitely push incoprea further. Here is my only attempt at Sora 1.
25
As I continue to converse with the infinite void, an interesting, re-occuring Herzogian thought plays in my head as dark visions. Flashes of things squirming, filling the darkness. Pointless moving masses, eating, breading and dying while simultaneously overlapping.
It is a further desconstruction of human social constructs, first I was focussed on larger more tangable aspects like the mechanics of it but now I’m examining the social aspect. The respected order and form of routine expectations. Everything we do, the act we play. The human animal broken down to primitive need and survival, full and short.
Stimulation; I used to think people were motivated by things food, survival, love, peace and war but STIMULATION covers all of these (when needed). Of all the clients I worked with at the state hospital and over the years, one thing was common among ALL diagnoses, Seeking stimulation. There are probably some disorders that involve a numbness to this aspect but everything else follows. While a carrot on a stick is the motivational factor, the will behind the peruse is entirely stimulation (in whatever flavor (hunger, approval, routine..)).
Worked non-stop through my initial 30 day Veo3 subscription and created ALL of the videos I had written out and planned leading up to this. The result so far? I lost 9 subscribers lol. I STILL will not do pop culture or viral trends. Worst case, I make what I want and post them to archive. I HAVE to focus on freelance work and day job this week so that I am able to continue.
I will still probably work in the background (slower) I am also keeping the VR gallery open and online on the OS grid. I found a freelance programmer in Portugal who helped me put it on there for only $20 a mo (Similar ‘land’ in SL would be about $3,000 a mo).
23
The Micheal Jackson AI music video, I reciently saw, had very little to do with what I think he would have approved of, it seemed wrong. Existing copyright laws can still work when people profit from work under copyright.
On the flip side, laws do not always equal morals (there have been MANY unjust laws). Copyright overlaps with peoples lives (experiences) which brings to point, how much, if any, of our ‘experience’ is owned by corporations?
My personal favorate ‘side effect’ of ai has been in the dymistification of entertainment authority and marketing (people believe less of what they see on edited media) With all the trickery behind the scenes, creating a ‘healthy skeptisism’
21
Programming is like water, even more so with the assitance of ai. I added youtube videos to my vr gallery, it is coded so that you cannot but AI can write code that goes around even that, like water. Also im 50 today.
18
In my VR gallery, I created a small sphere. I made it white and added a slight glow. I scripted the tiny sphere so that it would (within a range) randomly go up and down (within a range) randomly move a short distance, then randomly repeat (or not). Each one released (same code), traveled different paths around the map ‘feeling’ alive. I believe it is the randomness and perceived choices. Trying to create alt AI residents that can create original works of art and music. I’m sure it will be clunky at first.
17
The VR gallery is back ONLINE ( get there in bio )
16
When I think about meaning in art, I think about what I want to know from others. I want to know their firsthand experiences. Anything else is just something that they heard and thereby less authentic. I’d rather know how someone got their can of beans than what they heard on the radio, as fantastical as it may sound. Insecurities play a lot into what I say and do as well. Projecting something deemed generally positive to make up for some maybe nonexistent flaw. And to that extent, seek to copy what has done well in the past. TWO of my former classmates have moved to create better images, one artist who now says Seattle based and one singer who now bills as Nashville artist. Fine and dandy, but what is real and true is experience and I am a midwestern artist. As unglamorous as that may seem to be in flyover country. I embrace it, because I know nothing else.
15
MIDWESTERN URBAN The Midwest is a vast open space with few neighbors. Midwestern Urban outcroppings became meeting places of these distant individuals. Here you will find collections of artwork that made it directly from the folks to the nearest beacon of an audience available. But the midwestern audience has a more practical eye. Opting to value first what is of use during harsh and scarce winters. Thick timber in sturdy railway warehouses and other repurposed structures into lofts and businesses remain. A slower pace of change than our costal counterparts. Slow enough to gather fragments of every era layering its skyline in reluctant, evolutionary ramps of human architectural progress.
The local flourishing apples are hardy and strong but sweet. The corn and wheat is are no different; practical, laborious, essential. There are unverified stories of ancient meeting-places in the midwest between hunters and possibly certain policing roles that were rotated to different individuals each year. Most likely aligned with harvest and winter. What IS known is the Native city of Cahokia where St. Louis is today. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cahokia
11
Well, that was a fun run! I may try more if an idea hits but I think I want to work on game design for a minute. brb. https://godotengine.org/
5
Can’t stop, wont stop. When I was in 9th grade, I got certified to use the public access studio in our local high school. I checked out cameras and edited videos but was always to scared to ‘go live’ My friends made a show called the Hour o Joy and they did not have the same fears I did. I loved their show! I made one music video set to Time by Anthrax using media captured by VHS off of our family T.V. (that tape is out there somewhere) Later I worked for a production company in Minneapolis as a graphic designer, working my way up to Art Director. We made corporate videos, commercial and produced large meetings and events. I was often at these events for delivery, set up and to QUICKLY edit for clients and work with them on presentations. I would often run the visuals from behind the curtain. It’s nice to finally have a say in what I want to make.
1
Good morning! Happy to work on new things and meet new people at work today. I was able to afford a computer and Veo3 via Flow was offering a half off discount. Once I had both, I used three of my sick days fro work (I have never used any before). The videos are a core passion, but continuing at this time would be putting a burden on me and my family as it is just in hobby mode (not revenue generating). I dream of one day being able to do this full time AND support my family, the archetypal YouTuber dream. Interestingly, the (out of copyright) Blind Willie Johnson song is banned from being viewed in Russia…
September
30
Last day of Sept. and hopefully last day of making videos for a while. I used all the credits I could afford and made everything I wanted to +. We’ll see how it does. Now I want to focus on my freelance work and day job. I also am learning game design, but it will be a while before I am able to post anything playable. (soon enough)
28
Admittedly, I went overboard and rendered insanely. What might have been a very good 2 minute video ended up being 12 minutes (edited down from 17) I published it and right away lost two subscribers. It’s fine, and I understand. I unlisted it. I will take a break and try to learn some more game design. I understand some of my experimental stuff is not going to be as palatable. still seeking balance without restraint.
27
Ok, I have a break to take a breath. Been running as fast as I could with the Veo 3 in *unlimited Fast mode. At this moment, I am being timed out, very few renders are getting through and I don’t blame them. I have been firing off renders for about 5 days straight. Lots of good new work. Keeping all ads off, which is an alternative benefit to partnership. I am going to look into making games and getting the VR gallery back online. Once Veo3 is fluid again I will switch and again neglect this blog.
I continue to unlist ‘bury’ my less popular (experimental) work in playlists and links; i.e.
23
ok so, VEO3 is through FLOW and it is $125 for 25,000 credits and renders are 100 credits. so 50 cents per render (with audio_currently unlimited in fast mode!). The Sora 720 included unlimited with gpt $20 is good too, but without audio Flow seems to be the best deal. OMG wow! yeah veo3 is enough.
looked at artlist and bought some credits but didn’t even get to render before I requested a refund. They want 3,000 credits fro 6 second (unseen)… maybe its Veo3 and maybe its great but $20 for 16,000 credits sounded like a lot but, 16/3 = $5.33 per 6 second render. I asked for a refund. Still looking into Veo3. I like the sound ability. Kling was good at both.
22
This is my first attempt @ Sora ($20/mo tier) 720 limit. The only other option is $200/mo (to remove watermark without cropping and achieve higher resolution) Runway is about half that price. Unsure what to do, a luxury rn.